V:
So soon it finally came,
That day, that dreaded date,
When you and i,
Had to go our separate ways.
How i wish that we could hold on,
Stay together a little while longer,
But now the time has come,
To say good bye to you.
And I know that we promised, to stay in touch with each other,
And i know we promised never, to let these memories fade.
But maybe,
One day some time from now, you'll,
Have to put me out of your mind,
And, maybe, that one day you'll move on...
C:
But i, gotta ask myself if i, will ever,
Be able to leave this behind me,
And a voice in my head says no,
These memories will stay with me, so,
A your eyes, your beautiful smile,
As your, sweet laugh pass through my mind,
I realise, that its gonna be hard for me,
To get over you...
Over you...
V:
And now its been so long,
And I wonder how i go on,
As i spend the night,
with dreams and memories of you.
And now I,
Live holding on to the,
Hope that we'll meet once more,
So that we can,
Be together again.
And I know that its been so long since we saw each other,
But I promise I'll never give up on our love
C:
But i, gotta ask myself if i, will ever,
Be able to leave this behind me,
And a voice in my head says no,
These memories will stay with me, so,
A your eyes, your beautiful smile,
As your, sweet laugh pass through my mind,
I realise, that its gonna be hard for me,
To get over you...
Never wanna get over you...
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
A soldiers lament
Born on a cold winter morning,
From birth, war and battle i was learning,
My sole gift to the world? Endless mourning.
Ousted from my cradle before i could walk,
Hefting weapons before i learnt to talk.
Sentenced from birth to endless marching,
Shattered weapons adorn the path that I'm walking,
This carpet of broken dreams so straight, never branching.
Heedless i walk serenaded by dying mens cries,
Steadily move on to where the next battle lies.
Slashing and parrying, shot through and run down,
Caught in the hated, familiar whirlwind of agony and sound,
And once again i bleed my life into the ground.
Deaths I've died a the whims of Aries, Mars and more,
Forever my lieges these ruthless and brutal Gods of war.
Fighting for hidden powers, abstract, whose reasons i don't know,
Farmer of despair, death is all i sow,
Yet another bloodied thread, in this vast tapestry of woe.
In the arms of my old friend death i seek solace from this strife,
Yet each time he forsakes me, to yet another life.
The soul is the same, though names and faces change,
As each time i stride on to battlefields, old or new and strange,
And each time my life is spent, carelessly, like loose change.
And so it shall be, till end of time, nothing will stop this torment,
So as i fight and die once more, I sing for thee,
This never-ending, never-dying, forsaken soldiers lament ...
From birth, war and battle i was learning,
My sole gift to the world? Endless mourning.
Ousted from my cradle before i could walk,
Hefting weapons before i learnt to talk.
Sentenced from birth to endless marching,
Shattered weapons adorn the path that I'm walking,
This carpet of broken dreams so straight, never branching.
Heedless i walk serenaded by dying mens cries,
Steadily move on to where the next battle lies.
Slashing and parrying, shot through and run down,
Caught in the hated, familiar whirlwind of agony and sound,
And once again i bleed my life into the ground.
Deaths I've died a the whims of Aries, Mars and more,
Forever my lieges these ruthless and brutal Gods of war.
Fighting for hidden powers, abstract, whose reasons i don't know,
Farmer of despair, death is all i sow,
Yet another bloodied thread, in this vast tapestry of woe.
In the arms of my old friend death i seek solace from this strife,
Yet each time he forsakes me, to yet another life.
The soul is the same, though names and faces change,
As each time i stride on to battlefields, old or new and strange,
And each time my life is spent, carelessly, like loose change.
And so it shall be, till end of time, nothing will stop this torment,
So as i fight and die once more, I sing for thee,
This never-ending, never-dying, forsaken soldiers lament ...
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Painting a picture, a picture of change
It began on one cold winter night,
First touch, first sight,
Something was about, to change my life..
Friends once before,
Neither remembered much more,
Through the passage of time each had forgotten.
So first touch, first sight,
First meeting, just two strangers in the night.
A new day, new light,
Shining on a friendship so bright,
Forged anew, sparkling with the future's promising dew,
A creation that was more than met the eye...
Little did i know,
Where it would go,
This friendship so bright,
Brought from the past, made to last.
A new day, new light,
New hopes for a future so bright.
Like a thief in the night,
Like the cool breeze and its playful bite,
Refreshing and relaxing, it swept in,
The seed of that which would change my life...
The friendship so true,
Was to be strengthened through,
The flower, the tree that grew that night.
Agents of change, swept quietly in, like,
Thieves running their errands on that dark night.
The seed took root, as above grew its shoot,
Laden with the buds and the fruit,
Of sudden change, by which my life was swept through.
Then came the flowers in full bloom,
Never to wilt and so soon,
Came forth the truth, that the friendship was but a veil,
Covering an unknown entity, as it lay in wait.
Waiting for the tree to strengthen its root,
Waiting for the right time to deliver, its ever ripening fruit.
Veils and disguises peeled,
That which lay dormant, now wakened and revealed,
And the friendship the gave way to,
That agent of change, lighting up my life.
So once again on a winter night,
We met, but no longer strangers in the night,
Once again the experience, first touch, first sight,
Love for each other evident in our eyes,
Standing there in the white moonlight,
A beautiful picture,
My Sihaya and I...
First touch, first sight,
Something was about, to change my life..
Friends once before,
Neither remembered much more,
Through the passage of time each had forgotten.
So first touch, first sight,
First meeting, just two strangers in the night.
A new day, new light,
Shining on a friendship so bright,
Forged anew, sparkling with the future's promising dew,
A creation that was more than met the eye...
Little did i know,
Where it would go,
This friendship so bright,
Brought from the past, made to last.
A new day, new light,
New hopes for a future so bright.
Like a thief in the night,
Like the cool breeze and its playful bite,
Refreshing and relaxing, it swept in,
The seed of that which would change my life...
The friendship so true,
Was to be strengthened through,
The flower, the tree that grew that night.
Agents of change, swept quietly in, like,
Thieves running their errands on that dark night.
The seed took root, as above grew its shoot,
Laden with the buds and the fruit,
Of sudden change, by which my life was swept through.
Then came the flowers in full bloom,
Never to wilt and so soon,
Came forth the truth, that the friendship was but a veil,
Covering an unknown entity, as it lay in wait.
Waiting for the tree to strengthen its root,
Waiting for the right time to deliver, its ever ripening fruit.
Veils and disguises peeled,
That which lay dormant, now wakened and revealed,
And the friendship the gave way to,
That agent of change, lighting up my life.
So once again on a winter night,
We met, but no longer strangers in the night,
Once again the experience, first touch, first sight,
Love for each other evident in our eyes,
Standing there in the white moonlight,
A beautiful picture,
My Sihaya and I...
Friday, November 5, 2010
Defining it
So little, yet so much,
So clear, yet so obscured.
Understood and felt yet never defined,
Its wild and uncharted, yet feels so refined.
So little, yet so much,
So clear, yet so obscured.
Its an entire world explored without fear,
Yet its maps are never clear.
So little, yet so much,
So clear yet so obscured.
It can pain like a wound, yet never needs a cure,
It radiates joy, makes you feel warm to the core.
Soothes the mind, like the waves at a shore,
Its makes life easier by so much more.
Its so little, yet so much,
So clear yet so obscured.
Its effects are strange and not fully explored,
Its a weight, but one that when piles up, lightens your load.
So little, yet so much,
So clear, yet so obscured.
Its a cozy blanket wrapping you in its fold,
Its comfort and warmth during winters cold.
So little, yet so much more,
So clear, yet so obscured.
Some may call it a madness with a sweet lure,
But if it is, i never want it cured
So little , yet so much more.
So clear yet so obscured.
Felt so clearly, yet can't be explained, or to others told.
Its a wonderful sight, true beauty to behold.
So clear, yet so obscured.
Understood and felt yet never defined,
Its wild and uncharted, yet feels so refined.
So little, yet so much,
So clear, yet so obscured.
Its an entire world explored without fear,
Yet its maps are never clear.
So little, yet so much,
So clear yet so obscured.
It can pain like a wound, yet never needs a cure,
It radiates joy, makes you feel warm to the core.
Soothes the mind, like the waves at a shore,
Its makes life easier by so much more.
Its so little, yet so much,
So clear yet so obscured.
Its effects are strange and not fully explored,
Its a weight, but one that when piles up, lightens your load.
So little, yet so much,
So clear, yet so obscured.
Its a cozy blanket wrapping you in its fold,
Its comfort and warmth during winters cold.
So little, yet so much more,
So clear, yet so obscured.
Some may call it a madness with a sweet lure,
But if it is, i never want it cured
So little , yet so much more.
So clear yet so obscured.
Felt so clearly, yet can't be explained, or to others told.
Its a wonderful sight, true beauty to behold.
Discovering 'It'
What is it? That mysterious feeling, the one that everyone talks about so often, yet can never explain. What defines it? How can you tell from any other feeling or emotion?
Well no answer is usually the answer to these questions, and if any try to explain, they invariably fail. After all, it is not something that can be neatly, scientifically defined with various labels or assigned any symptoms, for everyone one has a different approach to it, each persons path follows a different set of directions and crosses different trails en route to this destination. For those who have known it, it is something very beautiful yet, like the best pieces of abstract art, undefined, imparting different impressions and meanings to everyone, and thus it is something to be experienced, to be felt and enjoyed, but never defined. But for those who haven't experienced it yet, it is a mysterious puzzle, a riddle with no apparent answer, and thus it was with me.
All the while I searched for something like, i found nothing. Hunting high and low in vain, trying to define it, to give it a shape and forcing my expectations on to it. Questioning every thought and feeling to see if it had finally arrived. I was searching so hard for it, too hard in fact, and so it never came. All that i saw were mere mirages of that which was promised, teasing me from afar.
Frustrated, i finally gave up searching, i gave it up as something incomprehensible and absurd, something existing only for dreamers, forgetting that while part of me was a sharp thinking rationalist, a part was a dreamer. I went about scorning all those who wandered mooning about it a hopeless romanticists, not knowing the romantic that lay slumbering within.
And ironically, the minute i gave up searching for it, it began its approach. The very instant i gave up on it, it entered my life, quietly like a thief in the night, gently like the cool morning breeze, riding within the Trojan horse of a friendship, that was destined to be something more, it penetrated my defenses, the walls i had set up, breaking through and gently awakening all that lay hidden within. It opened me up to something different, new, something unexpected and wonderful. There was no fan-fare, no drums and trumpets no waving banner, just an unexplained warmth and quiet smiles, and i realised that it had finally arrived.
It was all that i expected yet more than i'd have ever thought. It was all i had imagined and yet so much more that even imagination couldn't cover it all. Of course one thing is for sure, while i feel it, i still can't explain it. Its the way i can't keep my eyes off hers, the way i mean it with all my heart when i tell her that i love her. Its like the rush of heart when i feel her warm breath on my ears as she whispers those three words to me, the warmth that surges through me when i touch her hand, the sincerity with which i tell her that she's beautiful. The way way I accept her for who she is and she accepts me, it shows up in how even when she annoys me, i can't help but feel that happy glow. It comes to me as that feeling of comfort and safety, the feeling that everything will be alright when she wraps me in her warm caring embrace.
Its so little, and yet so much. It appears so clear and yet so obscured. It can happen anytime, anywhere, can take any form. For me its blossomed in those tender words, that warm touch and that loving embrace.
Well no answer is usually the answer to these questions, and if any try to explain, they invariably fail. After all, it is not something that can be neatly, scientifically defined with various labels or assigned any symptoms, for everyone one has a different approach to it, each persons path follows a different set of directions and crosses different trails en route to this destination. For those who have known it, it is something very beautiful yet, like the best pieces of abstract art, undefined, imparting different impressions and meanings to everyone, and thus it is something to be experienced, to be felt and enjoyed, but never defined. But for those who haven't experienced it yet, it is a mysterious puzzle, a riddle with no apparent answer, and thus it was with me.
All the while I searched for something like, i found nothing. Hunting high and low in vain, trying to define it, to give it a shape and forcing my expectations on to it. Questioning every thought and feeling to see if it had finally arrived. I was searching so hard for it, too hard in fact, and so it never came. All that i saw were mere mirages of that which was promised, teasing me from afar.
Frustrated, i finally gave up searching, i gave it up as something incomprehensible and absurd, something existing only for dreamers, forgetting that while part of me was a sharp thinking rationalist, a part was a dreamer. I went about scorning all those who wandered mooning about it a hopeless romanticists, not knowing the romantic that lay slumbering within.
And ironically, the minute i gave up searching for it, it began its approach. The very instant i gave up on it, it entered my life, quietly like a thief in the night, gently like the cool morning breeze, riding within the Trojan horse of a friendship, that was destined to be something more, it penetrated my defenses, the walls i had set up, breaking through and gently awakening all that lay hidden within. It opened me up to something different, new, something unexpected and wonderful. There was no fan-fare, no drums and trumpets no waving banner, just an unexplained warmth and quiet smiles, and i realised that it had finally arrived.
It was all that i expected yet more than i'd have ever thought. It was all i had imagined and yet so much more that even imagination couldn't cover it all. Of course one thing is for sure, while i feel it, i still can't explain it. Its the way i can't keep my eyes off hers, the way i mean it with all my heart when i tell her that i love her. Its like the rush of heart when i feel her warm breath on my ears as she whispers those three words to me, the warmth that surges through me when i touch her hand, the sincerity with which i tell her that she's beautiful. The way way I accept her for who she is and she accepts me, it shows up in how even when she annoys me, i can't help but feel that happy glow. It comes to me as that feeling of comfort and safety, the feeling that everything will be alright when she wraps me in her warm caring embrace.
Its so little, and yet so much. It appears so clear and yet so obscured. It can happen anytime, anywhere, can take any form. For me its blossomed in those tender words, that warm touch and that loving embrace.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
A Sense of Belonging...
She wakes up early in the morning at the crack of dawn or even earlier, and thus begins her busy busy day. First task of the day is to wake up the other slumbering members of the family, still snoring away even as the sun peeks up to say hello.So with a twitch of her nose and a wag of her tail she gets down to work.
Fifteen minutes later everyone's awake and getting ready for office and school. Meanwhile she outside in the veranda basking in the morning sun. Soon the gardener comes around and she leaves for her morning walk.
Skip a bit of the day and her breakfast is done. Satisfied, she settles down in her bed as the others scramble out of the house leaving her on her own for the next four hours. However the knowledge that she's going to be alone doesn't faze her, as she knows that they'll be back.
Her life may seem very simple and many may find it confining, not being allowed in certain parts of the house, having a restricted diet, scolded for making too much noise etc etc. its literally the life of a dog for Daisy. Still she's content and why is that so? Because she belongs, she fits into out family perfectly like a tree in a forest or like the missing piece in a puzzle.
And in that lies the secret to contentment at very least, if not complete happiness. Many of life's struggles come down to this one thing, the desire to fit in, to have a place where you feel you belong, where you are a part of a whole rather than a left out piece of some forgotten puzzle. our need for family, for friends to trust is once again the need to belong, to fit in. Quests for love are once again like searches for that one person with whom you can 'click', the person who can make you feel 'complete', or rather different as in adding newer sides to your personality... complete seems to cliched. The concept of two people one heart, soul-mates etc? All have the same underlying concept. Of course its not easy to find the place where you belong, the puzzle where you can fit in and help complete the picture.
Money, power and fame, these are all but temporary, as are their effects. Money can't buy you your family or friends, at least not true friends. Power, it is also temporary. You may be able to get hundreds of men jump to your whims one day, but you may be jumping at others commands the next. Even the most powerful emperors didn't rule forever and many lie in forgotten crypts with their bones turned to dust , as all memories and even myths about their exploits fade into oblivion. Same goes for celebrity, today almost everyone may know actor ABC, but what about 50-60 years down the line? Very few, if any at all will remember the existence of this current superstar. Worst thing is that many people sacrifice so many things to attain these 'coveted' surrogates for other more meaningful things in life. So i have to ask, whats the point of having sacrificed love and belonging to attain a 'permanent' place in the halls of history, when the halls itself are ever changing and nothing stays there forever? Why remain adrift like pieces of driftwood in an ocean, buffeted by its tempests and having to face its storm alone?
In the end i guess it all comes down to one question, would you be a piece fitting well into its mosaic, or a lone wolf, forever hunting, never resting? Of course its not a picture of pure black and white, there are shades of gray in between, and those who can fit into these grays, who can strike a comfortable balance, they are probably best off. As for me however, i'd rather fit in somewhere, be another petal in the flower, and find comfort in the company of those i love and care about, friends, family... a soul-mate...
Fifteen minutes later everyone's awake and getting ready for office and school. Meanwhile she outside in the veranda basking in the morning sun. Soon the gardener comes around and she leaves for her morning walk.
Skip a bit of the day and her breakfast is done. Satisfied, she settles down in her bed as the others scramble out of the house leaving her on her own for the next four hours. However the knowledge that she's going to be alone doesn't faze her, as she knows that they'll be back.
Her life may seem very simple and many may find it confining, not being allowed in certain parts of the house, having a restricted diet, scolded for making too much noise etc etc. its literally the life of a dog for Daisy. Still she's content and why is that so? Because she belongs, she fits into out family perfectly like a tree in a forest or like the missing piece in a puzzle.
And in that lies the secret to contentment at very least, if not complete happiness. Many of life's struggles come down to this one thing, the desire to fit in, to have a place where you feel you belong, where you are a part of a whole rather than a left out piece of some forgotten puzzle. our need for family, for friends to trust is once again the need to belong, to fit in. Quests for love are once again like searches for that one person with whom you can 'click', the person who can make you feel 'complete', or rather different as in adding newer sides to your personality... complete seems to cliched. The concept of two people one heart, soul-mates etc? All have the same underlying concept. Of course its not easy to find the place where you belong, the puzzle where you can fit in and help complete the picture.
Money, power and fame, these are all but temporary, as are their effects. Money can't buy you your family or friends, at least not true friends. Power, it is also temporary. You may be able to get hundreds of men jump to your whims one day, but you may be jumping at others commands the next. Even the most powerful emperors didn't rule forever and many lie in forgotten crypts with their bones turned to dust , as all memories and even myths about their exploits fade into oblivion. Same goes for celebrity, today almost everyone may know actor ABC, but what about 50-60 years down the line? Very few, if any at all will remember the existence of this current superstar. Worst thing is that many people sacrifice so many things to attain these 'coveted' surrogates for other more meaningful things in life. So i have to ask, whats the point of having sacrificed love and belonging to attain a 'permanent' place in the halls of history, when the halls itself are ever changing and nothing stays there forever? Why remain adrift like pieces of driftwood in an ocean, buffeted by its tempests and having to face its storm alone?
In the end i guess it all comes down to one question, would you be a piece fitting well into its mosaic, or a lone wolf, forever hunting, never resting? Of course its not a picture of pure black and white, there are shades of gray in between, and those who can fit into these grays, who can strike a comfortable balance, they are probably best off. As for me however, i'd rather fit in somewhere, be another petal in the flower, and find comfort in the company of those i love and care about, friends, family... a soul-mate...
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